Thing number one: My brain is extra super good at remembering song lyrics and notes. I would feel silly and braggy talking about something I am this weirdly talented at but I don't think this is bragging at all because it is obviously such a ridiculous and useless talent. I love to sing and my brain loves to memorize notes. I hear a song once or twice and that's it; the next time I am shopping at T.J. Maxx and the song plays I am noticeably singing along. And by "noticeably" I mean NOTICEABLY, like singing nearly out-loud and making super expressive faces. I don't even have to like the song. I can love it or hate it or think it's really bland-- I do not discriminate. I just sing. Loudly. To this and this and this and this and this and this. Every word, every note. I cannot help myself. (And yes, I just clicked on each one of those music videos and sang along with them before publishing this post and just for the record the master list of these songs would be thousands of songs long. These were the first six that came to mind because I heard and sang along with several of them today.)
Thing number two: I talk to strangers. If one of my kids is being extra cute or funny or I can't find the brand of deodorant I want or I'm standing on a street corner and the light is taking a long time to turn into the "please walk across the street now, quickly, and you probably won't get hit by a car" signal, I look around and make eye contact with the nearest person and start chatting with them about the goofy situation we are in. Once we were eating lunch at my favorite Indian lunch buffet when I saw another mom with a baby Clark's age. He was only about three or four months old at the time, and I was totally in momfriend-making mode. The conversation went down like this.
Me: Oh my goodness, how old is your little girl?
Disinterested Other Mom: Uh, she's three and a half months old.
Me: NO WAY! That's how old my son is too! When's her birthday?
Disinterested Other Mom: Um, January Fifth.
Me: NO WAY! That is my son's birthday too! How crazy! Where was she born?
Disinterested Other Mom: (sigh) St. Vincent Women's hospital.
Me: NO FREAKING WAY!!! That's where Clark was born! They were born on the same day in the same hospital- that's crazy! They're birthday buddies!
Me to Disinterested Other Mom's Baby: Hey there sweet little girl, this is Clark, he is your birthday buddy!
Disinterested Other Mom: (pause) Uh, yeah. I guess.
Clearly not all people are people people.
This was around the same time that I totally gave up on trying to make friends with other local moms.