I don't blame you.

I just had to google the word "temperament" because I didn't believe it had an A in it.
It does.

Sometimes it is kinda nice to find out you don't know something you thought you knew.  It's a refreshing perspective; the promise of other things you've had all wrong.  Lightbulb things, maybe even, that could be out there, things that would make your blankets smooth out like a pond and the back of your arms warm up and your whole universe make more sense.

You are wrong a lot.
Wrong about things you might not fully understand and (worse) things that you are completely smug about. 

And by "you" I mean me.
And by "you" I also mean you.
But I mostly mean me.

You know?

(The title. If you know the album version please know that I am singing the back-up "Iiiii doo-oo-oon't blame you" and the "theeey ne-e-ver owned it" along with this YouTube one and I think you should try it too, it's fun.)

Also!  THIS IS IMPORTANT! I feel like kind of a jerk for all of the "look my house is clean and organized!" stuff recently.  Please know that it is a struggle for me, which I have blogged about before,  here and here and here and here.  Oh, that last one is a good one -- if you want to see my MESSY house, the other side of the coin, the other 50% of my reality, READ IT.  Actually read them all, because looking at the photos in that post now?  Now that I have three kids and not two and the older two are tornadoes?  Those photos are like any random Tuesday morning.  Things get so much worse than that now, and it happens in one day.  We can go from sparkling and organized to insane in about two hours, and it takes about four to six hours to get it back to square one. It is a non-stop battle between me and my house, my cave, my perception of reality.


  1. Oh but in the chaos there is beauty.

    Chaotic beauty, mayhaps?

  2. That photo is cracking me up.

    But, about the post. So true. That's how I've felt many, many times since becoming a mama. I don't think I noticed the importance of being wrong pre-motherhood.

  3. My usual method of dealing with my messy house is to stay away from it as much as possible during the day. I cleaned today while my babies napped and I think it helped boost my self esteem a few points.

    Love the picture of Clark!

  4. How very cool and REAL are you?!
    I'll admit...there are some days (probably because I'm feeling HUGELY inadequate) that it seems every blog I follow is about perfect families who like...grind their own home grown grain to make their own home made bread at like 3am in a brick oven the handy hubby whipped together - meanwhile the tandum nursing homeschooling family of like 20 were singing edelvise (spelling correctly too probably LOL)I LOVE it when I see the blogs that are REAL. All us mamas out there who are honestly trying to do the very best we can for our little angels (please don't make me take the crayon out of your nose again...stop hitting your brother....I'm raising my voice now...)
    Somedays it's the boost I need just to make it to noon :)

    Michelle :)

  5. sigh...and I need to stop saying "like" clearly :)

  6. I followed the "READ IT" link and loved it. The writing on the wall closely resembles the state of my lampshades, walls, floors, rugs, and sofas.

    Did you know I tried to poison my kids with Tabasco-laced marshmallows the other week? Sometimes I get fed up. (But that wasn't because they were writing on things. That was because they were stealing marshmallows.)

  7. I appreciate both types of posts. The ones where everything looks perfect give me something to aspire to, and the ones that show the mess make me feel better about not reaching that perfection.

    I have often felt embarassed as the state of my house when our baby sitter came over. I recently went into her home and it was messier than mine. That made me feel a bit better about not being June Cleaver.

  8. There is something about realness that I adore. Thanks for keepin' it.

  9. Erin, come and clean my house. I'll forgive you for your sparkly house.

  10. I am newer to your blog so I had never seen the other 50% of your reality, and all I can think is: Is that an oilcloth under your kitchen table?! Because if it is, not only is that totally smart, but completely cute, too. Oh, and your imperfections are endearing.

  11. well, i have felt this way so many times. i hope i'm not the jerk.
    ;) you articulate it humorously and well, friend!

  12. well. just had to add one more. :)

  13. you need to come over to my house, but not unannounced. of course....

  14. Clark's face in that picture tells it's very own story and I love it. This post was refreshing, and so true it gave me a little soul tug. Because we are wrong so often...and it's in knowing that fact that we're able to grow. As far as your house goes? It's beautiful, whether messy or clean, because it's filled with love and life and laughter and REAL. All because of you :)

  15. Aww, son't feel like a jerk. You should be happy that you had it tidy to show us all. We moms know that a tidy house if fleeting with young ones.
    In my home, I have a 20 year old, and always marvel at how in no time at all we have un-tidied the house!
    Right at this very minute, my dinner party dishes are piled up from last night, and I still haven't picked up all the wine glasses from the table. You can see how tidy the table looked in my new post though ;)

  16. A friend once told me that she thought that my perfectly spotless apartment that I had when I was single always felt lonely to her.

    There's no sign of lonely in this place now. Many times, there is also no sign of the floor.


  17. See, I think you are so real about everything that there's no possible way you could come across as a jerk even when sharing about how you keep a room organized and/or clean. Because we're all moms, and we all know that an organized room doesn't STAY organized and a clean room doesn't STAY clean. It often has to completely fall apart before you can get up the gumption to bring it back to a fairly functional state.

    It's like how my blog is called "The Happiest Mom" and sometimes I feel like a jerk and a fraud, wondering what anyone would think if they peeped in my window at 9:30 when my kids won't go to bed already and I'm totally at my wit's end. But even if I'm not always happy, I'm always trying to get back there. What matters is that we keep trying and reaching and helping each other with what we learn along the way--nobody would really expect that we're always in a continual state of perfection (that would be boring, anyway.)