12.30.2010

2010/2011

I should have written this yesterday, when I felt full of words.

I have many life strategies and this is one: when you can't keep up with doing all the normal little things, do something great big instead. It will give you a kick! Sounds simple enough, but it requires you to dig deep and force yourself to do something extra super hard when you are feeling like you don't have energy to even do something easy.

On Monday I took down the Christmas tree, alone, with three kids crying in the background. I wanted it out of my house and life and gone gone gone, but it seemed so hard, taking it down, that part of me just wanted to leave all the ornaments on and throw it out into the street, with the light cords dragging behind. But I dug deep and (faking) like a sane and rational person, packed everything away with strained attention to detail, grudgingly pairing each glass ornament with a cloth one that will protect it.

I just had to "mark all as read" in my google reader. And "all" meant, well, all. All of you. There are so many emails I've never returned. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I appreciated your card and gift and love and I love you back, but I'm so ridiculous and tired. I feel like a selfish uninspired jerk. And yet all I can think about is how much I want a new camera. A camera. A camera to look at things through. Now everytime I look at one of my photos, I see noise. I have outgrown my camera. I need a new camera. I need something great big. I need a kick!

I am going to try to start posting little things, a little at a time. Little photos. Little words. I love you all and I have more things to say and tell you and share. 2011, I see you. Eleven has always been one of my favorite numbers. I am so ready for eleven. Here's to eleven.


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Some of the people in this photo?  elizabeth, maria, lisa, stephmadeline, jessi, megan, and me!

Blogging is so friendly.

17 comments:

  1. to little things, big things, manning up, letting go, friends, un-crying babes, kicks, self-forgivness, and eleven!

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  2. For what it's worth, I don't see noise - just lots of love in that mirror. Great shot. And baby steps are a beautiful thing to take, particularly when one a) has a baby b) had a year end the way you did. *hugs*

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  3. I like 11, too, but kind of forgot until you reminded me. I'm even more excited now.

    Steph

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  4. Eleven is such an odd number, literally, not divisible by anything. I think that makes it pretty cool. Looking forward to a great year! Love your photo.

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  5. it is going to be a great year. i just know it.

    i love your photo display. especially the little pom pom strand.

    i marked 1000 post 'all as read' yesterday and blogged that i did that and hate it, too. such is life.

    but, life. it really is beautiful. and i like it through your lens & words, too.

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  6. yep, I ready for it too. We're going to hang together lots. With all our crazy kids.

    Looking forward to it.

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  7. happy new year, erin. i always liked eleven, too. (I'm a november birthday girl.)

    I like your strategy. I think I need to implement it today. I'm having a very 'noisy' day and this post felt like a little hug. Or a shared cocktail. xo

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  8. i am so ready for 11. i do everything evenly. i eat either 2 or 4 or 6 oreos. i drink 2 cups of coffee. i am weird.

    but i'm ready for this new chapter.

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  9. and i don't know what it is about your pictures, but they speak to me. like i want a book of YOUR PHOTOS.

    i completely understand the desire for a new camera, and i totally encourage it. it will change your life.

    but erin, your pictures are breathtaking.

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  10. I'm pretty in love with 11 too.

    Maybe 11 will kick ass for all of us?

    Something big IS coming. I can feel it.

    Right here.

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  11. Happy 2011, Erin!

    Sometimes I feel pressured to write blog posts that are "long" or "meaningful" or "super helpful." But lately I just want to write snippets of my day - little photos, little words. I think I will.

    stephanie@metropolitanmama.net

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  12. I love that you have always loved the number eleven. I haven't ever given much thought to the number eleven, I don't think, but I am verily excited for all that lies ahead. I too have a very great feeling about eleven.

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  13. Can I just say...

    "Eleven? ELEVEN?! This explains so much..."

    "Honey, I know you were expecting puberty...but you’re just gonna have to shine it on for a little while."

    I like 11 too. What movie is that from?
    ...almost famous.

    I think I'm glad Christmas is over too.

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  14. This photo is simply beautiful! <3

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  15. Your photos are beautiful...like enviably so. :)

    Happy, happy new year to you!

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