4.30.2012

i guess this is something people do

So I've been running.  I wouldn't call myself "a runner" or anything so confident and commitment-y just yet, but I have forced myself to go outside and run every day (minus one or two) for the past month.

First of all, I feel like I have to tell you that am not this kind of girl.  I don't wear yoga pants or shoes with laces, EVER, and I certainly don't "go work out" or "to the gym" or whatever. I wear a lot of eye makeup and I am particular about my hair and I am disorganized. I am not a morning person. I am pear-shaped and redheaded. I am not athletic.

There was a time when reading a blog post about running would have irritated me. Twitter and Facebook updates, "I just finished a 2.8 mile run!" made me squint and shake my head a little. Why did these people have to TELL me they exercised? Why do we have to TALK about it? Either you run or you don't and either way it isn't my business.

It was this ever-so-slight irritation, however, that made me try it myself.  With each, "I just finished a 4 mile run!" status update, I began to actually believe that a four mile run is something people do. They just go outside and do it. Okay! Wait? This is something people do? They buy the right clothes and shoes and put them on. Then they go outside and move their feet back and forth.

Okay.

As I was in the middle of my very long blogging break and felt like my brain was sinking right out of my head, I decided to shake some energy out. To pull myself together.  To go buy the right things and put them on like a costume and pretend I am someone who moves her feet back and forth.

I downloaded C25K and put on my running shoes and talked myself out of wearing my cardigan (I AM NOT ATHLETIC) over my Nike t-shirt. C25K didn't really work for me.  The bossy lady telling me when to go and when to stop got on my nerves. I loosely followed it for a week, and then figured out my own pace. There is a street next to ours that is exactly a half-mile loop. So I used that, adding a half-mile whenever I felt ready.

Yesterday I found myself hitting the TWEET THIS button on my Nike+ app.  "I just finished a 3.23 mile run!" I did.  I ran three and a quarter miles without stopping and I didn't want to kill myself. After the first mile I actually ENJOYED it.  I am sleeping better and have less anxiety. This is a very good thing.

I don't know how long I will stick with this but it is working for me right now. I never thought I would have a positive experience with running. I have tried many times before but never pushed past the "I want to die" stage. I am running outside, slowly, with a face the color of a tomato. It is embarrassing and sometimes hard, but I don't want to die.  You have no idea how surprised I am.  (Also Luke. He is surprised. He is so surprised that he is, in his words, "a little scared." Me too honey!)

(I have to give a TON of credit to Erin and Erica and Keli and others for their twitter chats about running. Erin started running one year ago yesterday and was totally my inspiration. Her runs and commentary about them are what got me going and keep me going.)


22 comments:

  1. You are a rock star.
    Especially with the cardigan.

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  2. As someone who gives the silent eye roll to those "I just ran 804 miles in 1 hour" fb posts I commend you. This is the first post I've read that is genuine and inspiring. Good for you! I'm glad it's making you feel good and sleep well. Perhaps I should cut the other runners a break. :) I'd be the girl in a nike shirt with a cardigan and lip gloss walking briskly....eating a cupcake. Guess I don't have much room to eye roll. :)

    Happy running!

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  3. Way to go, Erin!!! I was in your exact same position last June, and it was Erin who inspired me, too. I was always someone who said I would never run unless someone was chasing me. With a weapon. And then I did the C25K thing, and I ended up loving running and now I still can't even believe it, but I have registered for a half-marathon for this fall. It's crazy. I'm proud of you! From one "i'll never be a runner" to the next. Keep it up, girly! (Even for the mental benefits alone!)xo

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  4. I am so proud of you!
    My thing is that I still hate running most days. Sometimes on long runs, I forget how to put my feet down and I run all crazy for a few beats until I get them back under control. I often wonder why I don't just walk. The way I feel after each run is what keeps me going. Oh, and I totally roll my own eyes at my Facebook run posts, but knowing that if I slack off, someone out there might notice keeps me going too. It's nuts, I know, but some days I need all the motivation there is!

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  5. this is SWONDERFUL! SERIOUSLY!

    ok. where to begin, you know i love you and your blog so much, and it's always been one that I'm so excited to see a new post in my reader, so there's that.

    this made me laugh a lot, because i have these fantasies about totally being a runner, but i have never been a runner and i am a redhead too and i totally get a tomato head. also, i have super cracker jack knees and i might be using that as an excuse.

    truth is, i could see myself loving it, just getting out there all by myself and moving my feet back and forth - i giggle every time i read that!!!!

    TOTALLY TOTALLY proud of you, lady. seriously.

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  6. geeze...why'd you have to post this?
    I got through 2 weeks of c25k & gave up completely.
    I need to try again, I really do. Because I did feel better while I was doing it.
    But yea, good on you. :)

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  7. I'm so happy for you! I finished C25K by running a real 5K and then ran a second and THEN a 10K. AND I AM NOT A RUNNER.

    (but then I got an injury and that sucks and I haven't been since. boo.)

    I miss it so much. Can't wait to hear more about your running journey!

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  8. running has been my sanity and my saving grace for twenty-some years now. it's the most pure source of joy i have. even with my dumb knees.

    enjoy and stride on.

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  9. great job!

    and you can keep running, for me, you know, cuz I don't. :)

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  10. I wrote about running and felt like a fraud, especially when I didn't continue with it (you know, it turned out that Pilates has really always been my thing and I'm going to stick with that)but when I WAS running, it was something to write about. It was totally worthy no matter how long you do it or if you continue on. It's a big deal right now. Write that shit down!

    Steph

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  11. I have running envy. I don't REALLY want to run, because I'm sure I could if I tried, but everything about it makes me want to hurl myself into oncoming traffic. This makes you twice the badass in my eyes.

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  12. I started running when I was 25 (you're about that age, right? ; )
    It took me SIX MONTHS to run 3 miles w/o stopping.
    You're doing amazing, and it would totally be worth writing about even if you hadn't reached that goal -- because it's part of your life right now.
    Now, if I could just *still* run that 3 miles w/o stopping...

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  13. Hey there....we met on the Twitters when talking about our High School freakdome :-)
    I LOVE THIS. I played sports for years but never thought I'd learn to like running. Last year I FINALLY broke through and started to "feel it". Then I got pregnant and sick and stopped for a long time. I'm just now getting back into it, and it's still in the SUCKY part. Thanks for reminding me that it does get better...even for people that aren't runners :-)

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  14. RIGHT? I'm the same way. I'm three weeks into C25K... and although I've been sick and can't run, I actually kind of secretly like running. What the fuck. I don't recognize myself anymore!

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  15. This right here: "I downloaded C25K and put on my running shoes and talked myself out of wearing my cardigan (I AM NOT ATHLETIC) over my Nike t-shirt." literally made me laugh out loud. That would totally be me...just try get me out of a cardigan!
    So glad you're back in the blog world. It would be a sadder place without you.

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  16. Oooh, you've been bitten by the bug!! ;) I'm a tad jealous since I'm currently side-lined due to an ankle energy. Boo.

    So proud of you for getting out there and doing it girl! GO YOU!!!

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  17. I feel so much better when I exercise. I am practically a different person--happier, more energetic, more balanced.

    I have been having fantasies lately of running and exercising HARD. But I'll have to wait awhile to put my running shoes on my pregnant feet. Then I shall shock the neighborhood with just how red my entire body turns when I run.

    Glad you're enjoying it. Glad you're taking the time for yourself. It's hard to make the time as a mom (let alone of three). Well done.

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  18. I have never been athletic and have always been rather sickly, and so naturally I hated exercise like poison. But using my elliptical 20-30 minutes five times a week has made a dramatic difference with my anxiety.

    PS you are totally superwoman.

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  19. I actually like it when people post about their runs b/c it motivates me to do the same...and it reminds me that I can.

    I am not the "typical runner" either. I am curvy and larger-chested...and I'v never run more than 4 miles.

    BUT - I do enjoy the way running makes me feel. Strong. Energized. Less stressed.

    I can't wait to begin running again (my body isn't ready yet...just had a baby 3 weeks ago!). I'm sure it won't be a pretty sight at first, but that's okay. I'll eventually find my groove again.

    stephanie@metropolitanmama.net

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  20. I am so glad you're back to blogging!

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  21. I'm so glad you're back to blogging!

    And you're inspiring me to get out and join the runners. :)

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